Sorry it has been a while since my last post. Finding enough time to actually sit down and write has been tougher than I thought. Anyway...
From the moment I have even thought about being a father, I have always wanted to keep the sex of the baby unknown. I know in today's instant gratification and need to know now world, that sort of thinking is very antiquated and old fashioned. Maybe the fact I am older than your average first-time father has something to do with it. Fortunately, I am married to someone who feels the same way; therefore, from the outset of this experience Joanna and I decided we were not going to find out if we were having a boy or a girl until the little critter actually appears in the world. Obviously, this is a personal choice and I do not look down on those that do find out what the sex is prior to the actual birth; however, the reaction we have gotten from many has ranged from apathetic to proud to almost angry.
To be honest, not finding out the sex of the baby has not been as difficult as I thought it would be. Joanna and I were able to agree on some very nice gender neutral colors to paint the nursery and coming up with a neutral theme was not a monumental challenge (pictures of the nursery will be posted once it is completed). The hardest part has been trying to explain to some who ask if we are having a boy or a girl why we are not finding out.
First, the only reason we need to give is because we don't want to. Secondly, it is one of the few remaining surprises left in the world and planning for the unknown is pretty exciting. Unfortunately, for some these answers have not been enough. To be fair, most of the responses have been either a shrug of the shoulders or supportive of this decision. Some, however, have gotten very upset and confused about this decision. They can't understand how we are able to plan or how we can see a sonogram of the baby and not want to know. A lot of these people we don't even know very well so I am not sure why they care, but to each their own. I think some are frustrated because they are not sure what to give us as a gift. If you are one of those, cash or gift cards are GREAT gifts!!! :-)
The best part of not knowing the gender is hearing all the crazy ways people KNOW exactly what we are having. They range from what Joanna is eating/craving, how oversized shirts hang over her belly, if she sleeps on her side or back, etc. And of course, everyone has an opinion and it has been a fun to hear all of the theories. Several family and friends have "wished" a girl on me for my many playful remarks about the softer gender over the past several years. I am quite certain, if it is a girl, she will have me wrapped around her little finger in no time! For the record, I am convinced it's a girl and Joanna is convinced it's a boy. I will take suggestions on what the wager should be between us on this one!
The only challenge remaining for us regarding the sex of the baby is picking names. Until next time...
Thursday, August 18, 2011
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
Saying Goodbye
I know this blog is about Joanna and me preparing to have a baby and my thoughts/fears/excitement about becoming a father; however, a traumatic thing happened about 2 months ago that I need to chat about.
On June 12, my dog of nearly 14 years passed away. While she was certainly and older dog who was slowing down and having some bladder control problems, she had been a major part of my life for so long that it has been hard to fathom she is no longer with me. Many of you reading this met Josie at some point and I honestly don't recall one person who spent any amount of time with her that did not think she was one of the sweetest dogs they had ever encountered.
I got Josie in September of 1997 when I was working at the NCAA in Overland Park, KS. Some friends of Shane and Emily Lyons found her as a stray in St. Joseph, MO, which is how she got the name Josie. Shane and Emily knew I was interested in getting a dog so they got me connected with their friends. The moment I met her, I was hooked. The vet guesstimated her age to be about 9 months so her "birthday" became January 15. She and I immediately bonded and I still remember taking her for walks around the apartment complex I lived in at the time. One of my favorite memories of that time with her was taking her to the great dog park in the area with her buddy Dee (Shane and Emily's dalmatian) and wearing her out to the point she would fall asleep on the drive home.
Around January 1998, Josie developed her trademark personality trait of constantly going in circles to her left (except when chasing rabbits, birds, a ball, etc.). I took her to a couple of specialists in the KC area and the conclusion was a possible tumor on her vestibular nerve, which distorted her sense of equilibrium. There was no way to tell exactly what it was without doing an MRI at the cost of approximately $1,000. Even then, there was no guarantee that it could be fixed so I decided to let it go since it clearly did not affect her appetite or disposition. She stayed that way for the remainder of the time I had her and I can't even begin to tell you how many times I had to explain her condition.
All in all, Josie was with me when I moved from KC to Indy, from Indy to Lubbock and from Lubbock to Fort Mill, SC. She was with me when I was passed over for a promotion at the NCAA, when I got a promotion at Texas Tech and when I ultimately became commissioner of the South Atlantic Conference. She lived in seven different apartments/town homes/houses with me and met quite a few females in my life, including my wonderful wife, Joanna. My point with all this is she was the one constant in my life of highs and lows for nearly 14 years. The scary thing for me to think about was Josie was part of my life nearly as long as my mom was (my mom died when I was 17).
As strange as it sounds, I really think having her in my life has prepared me to be a father. Before people start freaking out thinking I am comparing owning a dog to being a parent, let me explain. From September 1997 until June 2011, I was forced to become more responsible, patient (stop laughing!), nurturing and loving. I always had to think about how she would be cared for when I had to go out of town, when I could get home to let her out, when and what she could eat, etc. I truly believe my experience with her will help me be a better father.
I hate that our baby never got to meet Josie, but her spirit lives on in the house. Her buddy of 8 years, Shortstop (the cat) misses her and sill occasionally goes to the back door waiting for her to come back in the house. Even though Joanna does not particularly care for dogs, she has been a great support the past 2 months and I think we will get a new dog at some point in the next several years (no pressure blue eyes!).
I promise the next entry will be about the baby on the way!
On June 12, my dog of nearly 14 years passed away. While she was certainly and older dog who was slowing down and having some bladder control problems, she had been a major part of my life for so long that it has been hard to fathom she is no longer with me. Many of you reading this met Josie at some point and I honestly don't recall one person who spent any amount of time with her that did not think she was one of the sweetest dogs they had ever encountered.
I got Josie in September of 1997 when I was working at the NCAA in Overland Park, KS. Some friends of Shane and Emily Lyons found her as a stray in St. Joseph, MO, which is how she got the name Josie. Shane and Emily knew I was interested in getting a dog so they got me connected with their friends. The moment I met her, I was hooked. The vet guesstimated her age to be about 9 months so her "birthday" became January 15. She and I immediately bonded and I still remember taking her for walks around the apartment complex I lived in at the time. One of my favorite memories of that time with her was taking her to the great dog park in the area with her buddy Dee (Shane and Emily's dalmatian) and wearing her out to the point she would fall asleep on the drive home.
Around January 1998, Josie developed her trademark personality trait of constantly going in circles to her left (except when chasing rabbits, birds, a ball, etc.). I took her to a couple of specialists in the KC area and the conclusion was a possible tumor on her vestibular nerve, which distorted her sense of equilibrium. There was no way to tell exactly what it was without doing an MRI at the cost of approximately $1,000. Even then, there was no guarantee that it could be fixed so I decided to let it go since it clearly did not affect her appetite or disposition. She stayed that way for the remainder of the time I had her and I can't even begin to tell you how many times I had to explain her condition.
All in all, Josie was with me when I moved from KC to Indy, from Indy to Lubbock and from Lubbock to Fort Mill, SC. She was with me when I was passed over for a promotion at the NCAA, when I got a promotion at Texas Tech and when I ultimately became commissioner of the South Atlantic Conference. She lived in seven different apartments/town homes/houses with me and met quite a few females in my life, including my wonderful wife, Joanna. My point with all this is she was the one constant in my life of highs and lows for nearly 14 years. The scary thing for me to think about was Josie was part of my life nearly as long as my mom was (my mom died when I was 17).
As strange as it sounds, I really think having her in my life has prepared me to be a father. Before people start freaking out thinking I am comparing owning a dog to being a parent, let me explain. From September 1997 until June 2011, I was forced to become more responsible, patient (stop laughing!), nurturing and loving. I always had to think about how she would be cared for when I had to go out of town, when I could get home to let her out, when and what she could eat, etc. I truly believe my experience with her will help me be a better father.
I hate that our baby never got to meet Josie, but her spirit lives on in the house. Her buddy of 8 years, Shortstop (the cat) misses her and sill occasionally goes to the back door waiting for her to come back in the house. Even though Joanna does not particularly care for dogs, she has been a great support the past 2 months and I think we will get a new dog at some point in the next several years (no pressure blue eyes!).
I promise the next entry will be about the baby on the way!
Friday, August 5, 2011
The Beginning
March 4, 2011, started out like many other birthdays of mine since I began working in the world of college athletics. You see, I have the misfortune of almost always working very long hours on my 'big day' because it seemingly always falls on or around conference basketball tournament time. This particular year was the Friday before the semifinals of the SAC basketball tournament in Hickory, N.C., so it was set up day at the arena and the teams would be participating in shoot arounds most of the day. I had arranged to take the staff to a nice dinner that evening to thank them for their efforts surrounding the tournament thus far and also to have a small celebration for my birthday. Joanna would be driving up in the afternoon to join us for dinner and hang out with us during the games on Saturday and Sunday.
That morning as I was getting ready to leave the house, I had a very overwhelming feeling that my mom was wishing me a happy birthday. For those of you that don't know, my mom passed away from congestive heart failure when I was 17. I have had those sensations before, but this one was strong enough I actually had to sit down for a moment to gather myself. Needless to say, it was a nice way to start the day.
After several hours of loading the van, driving to Hickory, unloading the van and setting things up, I got to the hotel about 5:30 and Joanna was waiting for me with a very special birthday gift. It was a baby jumper that said, "I Love My Daddy" and a home pregnancy test that was positive. Obviously, it was the best birthday present I had ever received and I hugged Joanna so hard I was afraid I hurt her! Maybe it was my mom joining in the hug that made it seem that way!
The hard part was we had to go to dinner that night and act like nothing was different because we obviously could not tell anyone since she was only a few weeks pregnant. One more thing that made me feel like my mom was around was when Joanna told me the appointment with the obstetrician was on April 13 - my mom's birthday!!
Anyway, since March 4 our lives have been centered on getting ready for the baby's arrival. I have had the idea to start this blog for the past few months and, for various reasons, am just now getting around to starting to do it. Feel free to provide comments and feedback, but please keep them PG rated!! I'll be back soon with another entry.
That morning as I was getting ready to leave the house, I had a very overwhelming feeling that my mom was wishing me a happy birthday. For those of you that don't know, my mom passed away from congestive heart failure when I was 17. I have had those sensations before, but this one was strong enough I actually had to sit down for a moment to gather myself. Needless to say, it was a nice way to start the day.
After several hours of loading the van, driving to Hickory, unloading the van and setting things up, I got to the hotel about 5:30 and Joanna was waiting for me with a very special birthday gift. It was a baby jumper that said, "I Love My Daddy" and a home pregnancy test that was positive. Obviously, it was the best birthday present I had ever received and I hugged Joanna so hard I was afraid I hurt her! Maybe it was my mom joining in the hug that made it seem that way!
The hard part was we had to go to dinner that night and act like nothing was different because we obviously could not tell anyone since she was only a few weeks pregnant. One more thing that made me feel like my mom was around was when Joanna told me the appointment with the obstetrician was on April 13 - my mom's birthday!!
Anyway, since March 4 our lives have been centered on getting ready for the baby's arrival. I have had the idea to start this blog for the past few months and, for various reasons, am just now getting around to starting to do it. Feel free to provide comments and feedback, but please keep them PG rated!! I'll be back soon with another entry.
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